A few photos...

A little ice bouldering at Advanced Base Camp to stave off the boredom and insanity of being stuck at 18,500ft for over three weeks!

 

 

Summit Push and Big Decisions

Making a decision to turn around when so close to the summit is one of the easiest yet heart wrenching decisions ever. I say easy because your life flashes before you and you immediately think of those you love and want so desperately to see again. I say heart wrenching because you have invested so much to get to this moment of choice. We left at 8:00 pm and had been climbing in the dark for nine hours.....as the sun was beginning to hit our faces we were standing just below the French couloir at approximately 8,250m. I knew the summit was just a little over 150m and two hours away. The sun would warm us.....the climbing was not difficult.....we had come so far....for a split second we all thought, we are going to make it....then the lead Sherpa signaled for us to retreat by circling his arm in the air. My heart sunk yet I was the first to turn....no questions to ask... just start walking down. My husband, my family and my friends were in my thoughts. I had everything to lose and absolutely nothing but my name on a list (Himalayan database) to gain.

My oxygen system had failed at camp three and while delivering a slight flow of O's it was unreliable, it was very windy, and our Sherpa team ran out of fixed rope and could not protect the couloir (while it was 5.4 - 5.5 rock climbing, going up was easy, coming down without oxygen could be devastating) and my climbing partner had previously turned around. Bottom line, I was not willing to take the risk. It would be an additional 3-4 hours round trip to complete the last 100m. It would take me another 12 hours to get back to the safety of C2 for a total summit bid of 25 hours. To turn now would still be a 21 hour day. On an 8,000m peak it has to be 100% no question to proceed. I had three very fast reasons to turn around. No rope, no partner, and no guaranteed oxygen flow. I heard my grandma tell me to play it safe and be smart.

Here is a little taste what you leave on the table when you turn and walk away:
3 months with no work and therefore no income.
$13,500 for a spot on the expedition.
$2,500 airline ticket to Kathmandu (29 hours each way)
$3,000 in incremental/new/lost/damaged gear.
$400 in excess baggage.
$350 in evacuation insurance.
$1,000 in unexpected helicopter cost.
$600 in high altitude medications.
$1,000 in oxygen.
$900 in mask and regulator.
$750 in staff tips.
$750 in incremental travel costs.
58 days living out of a duffle.
8 years of weekly weight lifting sessions with Chris Morris (pure hell).

What I gained is a newfound respect and appreciation as to why so few have stood on top of this mountain. My hat goes off to those who have completed the journey. It was great to witness our German friends reach the summit! They were strong, fast and qualified. There is no gimme on this mountain. Makalu goes to only those who are 100% dialed and ready. In summation, Makalu kicked my ass but I love her more than any other mountain for reminding me who is in charge :-). The experience was simply priceless.

Tonya

 

Around 7 AM...on the way back down from our summit push..

Back In Kathmandu

Would you believe me if I told you I took a John Deere tractor to get from base camp to Kathmandu?  Well it is partially true. Makalu sits in a valley where there are no roads, similar to Everest.  One can walk for hours and not see another human....unlike Everest.  When we left base camp, we hiked a good 10-12 hours a day from village to village on a single track trail.  It was amazing to see the change in terrain.  The landscape was lush and bright green. The ice and snow was virtually gone and we were graced with waterfalls and rhododendron flowers in full bloom (pictures to follow soon).

After five days of walking out we come to a village called Num where a road has begun to be developed to support enterprise.  Unfortunately the road is a dirt road which becomes a small river when the monsoon arrives.....and the monsoon has arrived.  Our team boarded a John Deere which took 8 hours to go 60 kilometers to Tumlingtar yesterday. We took turns riding in the trailer with the expedition duffles. We were soaked to the bone from the torrential downpour. 

In some ways the ride was a great relief after trekking 10-12 hours for five days on steep terrain and slippery stones. We arrive to our destination, eat a plate of dhal baht, drink either a Touborg Beer, Coke or Milk tea and toss our sleeping bag onto a wooden bed with a one inch pad and hard pillow that we do not dare make direct contact with.  We sleep soundly and peacefully. 

When we woke up this morning we did not know if weather would permit flights to Kathmandu.....but we got lucky and got on one of four flights out.  It too was a rough ride but a dry one.  The shower felt great after 58 days without one.  A real mattress is a blessing.....and a/c a bonus.  I chose a hotel with a pool.....and cannot wait to jump in.  tomorrow I long to make a trip to Fire and Ice for pizza and ice cream. 

I look forward to giving you my full report of our summit bid and to posting photos.

-Tonya

 

Enjoying the Monsoon rain from the back of a bumpy trailer - being pulled by a not too quiet tractor

 

Headed to Kathmandu

Tonya is now off the mountain and well on her way to Kathmandu.  She is currently in the village of Sedewa - half way through a six day hike to Tumlingtar.  Once in Tumlingtar, she will catch a plane to Kathmandu. 

Back in Base Camp

Tonya is safely back in Base Camp now and will begin making her way to Kathmandu in the next day or two.  Not sure at this time if she will be taking a chopper ride back to Kathmandu or hiking out.  From the limited communications we've had, it sounds like they had a very long summit push and turned around primarily from the weather, but also experienced oxygen system malfunctions that were quite troubling.  She said their push for the top and return back to BC was the most difficult thing she has ever done.  All of that being said, everyone on the team is now safe and sound at BC and it will be great to hear the whole story from Tonya.

Quick Update

Tonya is safe and sound at Camp 2.  She is spending the night at C2 and will be descending further down the mountain in the morning.

Summit Push Update

The team has decided to turn back 300 meters short of the summit.  It is now 7:45 am Nepal time and they have been climbing for 12 hours.  I have not spoken directly to Tonya, but am hearing news from one of her climbing partners that has been sending updates on the team's behalf from his satellite phone.  It appears the weather is moving in, high winds picking up and precipitation moving in.  Moving further up into the French Coulior - the steepest part of summit day - is becoming impossible, or at the very least foolish.  Everyone is now on their descent to high camp at 25,500ft.  Updates to follow as news comes in.

Gettting Ready For Summit Push

Tonya reached Camp 4 - high camp - yesterday afternoon (local Nepal time) and will be leaving for the summit push around 8pm...(that's around 8am this morning Mountain Time in the US).  So within the next hour or so the team should be out of their tents and moving up.  All of this is, of course, weather dependent.  The latest news is that the weather is holding and all is good, but the most recent round of forecasts calls for a spike in the winds tonight into tomorrow morning.  If all goes according to plan, the climb to the top can easily take 20 plus hours of climbing.  We may not hear from the team for a while, but will post updates as often as possible.

Moving to Camp 3

Tonya and team have been climbing up the mountain, per schedule, over the last couple of days.  They reached Camp 2 yesterday under decent weather conditions.  I just received word that they are leaving for Camp 3 as I type this.  Today is expected to be a very long day, with some of the most technical climbing of the expedition.  Camp 3 - located at an elevation of 7,400 meters (just over 24,000 ft) - is at the top of the Makalu La...a major Col / pass on the mountain.  It will most likely take the team 12 hours or more to climb between C2 and C3, with steep rock climbing up to the La.  The weather seems to be holding and the short term forecast is still decent, although it appears that the threat of precipitation is advancing a little sooner than originally forecast.  From C3, the team will most likely make one more camp before the summit...updates to follow as the team reports in...

Entering the couloir below the Makalu La

 

Just below the Makalu La - steep rock, snow and ice at 24,000 ft.

 

Going Up

This expedition has turned into an endless waiting game for Tonya, largely due to fickle weather with constant high winds on the upper mountain.  Finally, however, it's looking like the team is going for the summit with a forecast of decent weather.  The plan is to leave ABC early tomorrow morning - May 18th.  In USA time zones, that is late afternoon - May 17th.  The team will make a series of 3 to 4 camps, with hopes of reaching the top early morning on the 22nd.  From there, they will get back down to ABC and BC, with plans to depart the mountain on the 24th.  It's still windy now, but if forecasts hold true, the wind should drop dramatically on the 21st, with steadily increasing temps and calm winds continuing through the 23rd.  Then, after the 24th, precipitation is supposed to pick up with return of heavy winds.  In other words, it looks like the team will be getting a classic one to three day weather window before the Monsoon moves in and closes down the climbing season.  Right now on Everest hundreds of climbers are going for the top over the next few days, while on Makalu there are only about 15-20 people on the entire mountain!  We may not hear from Tonya until she is back down from the summit attempt, and I'll update as often as possible.

The final traverse to the top, taken from Makalu's summit

 

 

AND...a short video of our good friend, Da Yula Sherpa, reaching the top of Makalu in perfect weather conditions a few years ago...

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-r4jcCkewsM

 

 

 

 

 

ALMOST - Moving On Up

Tonya called this morning, and there has been a slight delay in their plans to move up the mountain.  After reviewing the latest weather forecasts, it looks like it makes the most sense to hold off a couple of days.  The short term forecasts, that looked marginal to begin with, shifted to just plain bad.  Looks like the weather should begin to improve within a few days and that's when they will begin moving up.  Always a fluid situation.

Moving On Up!

Just received word from Tonya that she will be heading up the mountain on her push for the summit,  beginning tomorrow morning (local Nepal time).  She and her team are in a bit of a crunch for time as their expedition is set to depart the mountain on the 24th of May.  If they begin moving up now, they have just enough time to reach the top and return to Base Camp before their support and porter crew arrive on the 23rd to help with departure.  So, despite a less than stellar weather forecast the team is going to move up and keep going up until the mountain tells them to go down. This will be their final push.  If the weather holds, there should be some team members reaching the summit within the next few days to a week...and if the weather proves to not be favorable, they will descend having given it their best shot.

Dear Patience

Dear Patience, 

You are very difficult to pin down.  One minute you are next to me and within seconds you vanish. I spend months preparing for the climb.  We are presently 37 days into our expedition of 58 days.  Suddenly it feels like there are not enough days remaining to get it all done.   

We received news yesterday that the mountain will possess high winds and precipitation for another week thus giving us a very small window of days to climb.  It is a very uneasy feeling knowing that 46 porters are arriving on the 25th to clear our camp.  Suddenly you make us all feel as though we will run out of days. 

All at once our destiny is in the hands of the universe.  We are 80% of the way there.  Our challenge is now to simply stay healthy which is very hard at this altitude.  We are growing weary of the extremes like peeing in a potties, pooping in a hole, bathing with only wet wipes, drinking only hot drinks made from murky water, and watching our teeth turn yellow from drinking tea and coffee.   

Now we must hold on to you.  Patience, you have become our new challenge and guide.  You are now our determinant of success or failure.  If we panic and jump the gun, the weather will turn us back.  To wait for perfect conditions could mean we never leave base amp.  We will now dance the fine dance with you.   

We take take hikes, boulder/climb on the nearby penitents, we look for pretty rocks, we read, watch movies, write in our journals, call family, visit other camps, organize our gear, wash some clothes by hand, work on sudoku puzzles, sleep a lot, trim our nails, shave and try really hard to stay focused.

The Waiting Game...

Tonya is trying to remain patient as she and the team continue waiting at ABC.  Conditions on the mountain remain a bit uncooperative, with high winds and heavy snow.  Tonya was hoping to go up for a second rotation by now, but those plans have been postponed.  Besides trying all means possible to avoid going crazy at ABC, the team is analyzing weather reports from multiple sources so they can plan their next move.  Sounds like a weather window will be presenting itself around the 18th of May.  Some of the team might push for the summit at the first break in the weather, and others might choose to take another rotation up to Camp 2 and back to ABC, before making a run at the top later in May.

 

Climbers at 28,000ft on Everest's Southeast Ridge -

with Makalu in the background. (photo - Jimmy Chin)

Finished with first rotation up the mountain

Tonya and team are back in ABC after climbing up to Camp 2 (6,670m - 21,883ft). They experienced super high winds throughout the trip and said it was tough going.  They had hoped to stay at Camp 2 for a several nights, but given the high winds and very real risk of having their tents destroyed or blown off the mountain, they came back down a bit earlier than planned.  Back in ABC everyone is resting, eating and relaxing...with jet stream winds scraping the summit.  For now Tonya is going to rest a few more days and the team will be making decisions on when and how to proceed.  Some team members may be starting a summit push within the next week, and others may take a second rotation up to the higher camps and back to ABC, before making a final push to the top.  More than anything those decisions will be based on logistics, weather, and health.

 

The route up to Camp 1

 

 

 

View from Camp 2, looking up to the Makalu La

Camp 1

Tonya reached Camp 1 today (around 3pm local Nepal time, April 27th).  Situated at 6,347 meters, it was slow going due to strong winds and fresh snow.  Tomorrow the team plans to continue up to Camp 2 at 6,670m, before returning to ABC. 

On a sad note, news is beginning to filter out about a climber who died close to the summit of Makalu on April 23rd.  Tonya had mentioned this in an earlier text, but I was waiting until facts became more clear to write about it in this blog.  It appears a Chinese climber reached the summit along with three other teammates and fell on his way back down the mountain.  Below is a link to some further news on the accident.  The climbers, who summitted quite early in the season, were from a different team....everyone on Tonya's team is safe.


Makalu Accident:
http://www.explorersweb.com/everest_k2/news.php?id=21427

Heading to Camp 1

Tonya (and team) carried loads up the mountain yesterday, stopping about half way to Camp 1.  More than anything the carry was an acclimatization run to help everyone keep adjusting to the altitude.  They will be making a move to Camp 1 on April 27th, weather permitting.  It has been snowing quite a bit, and cold, which has meant lots of rest and relaxation at ABC. 

Getting ready to move up....

The latest from Tonya is that the team is still in ABC.  Weather has been relatively miserable - cold and snowy; most everyone on the team feels like they have a hangover despite no alcohol intake -  the general malaise of newly acquired altitude; and the main discussion topics are centered around what kinds of food they will eat when back in civilization - pizza seems to top the list.  So, in other words, sounds like business as usual for an 8000 meter peak base camp.  Their Puja - the traditional Buddhist celebration to honor the mountain gods and receive a blessing to climb - is scheduled for tomorrow morning (local Nepal time) and from there they will begin to move up the mountain.  Not sure if the entire team will be moving together all of the time, but within the next day or two most team members will explore options of moving to camp 1, weather and health dependent.

 

Himalayan Puja celebration

Advanced Base Camp

Tonya and her team reached Advanced Base Camp today.  For all intents and purposes, this camp will serve as the main base camp for the duration of the expedition.  Located at an elevation of 18,700 feet above sea level, Makalu's ABC is one of the highest base camps among the 8000 meter peaks.  The weather was barely cooperating on the hike to ABC...it took the team 8-10 hours of trekking in fresh snow with high winds and low visibility.  Throw in some major boulder hopping on rocks covered in ice, and all in all it proved to be a relatively exhausting day.  Sounds like the team is relieved to be in the dining tent enjoying hot food and tea before crashing for the night.  Before leaving for the mountain, Tonya had heard there would be 15 climbers on Makalu this season (plus their respective support and Sherpa staff), and in the next few days all of the teams will be settling into ABC.  After a few days of rest, the teams will collectively begin working the route above ABC and figuring out how best to get up the mountain.

Hillary Base Camp

Tonya is now at Hillary Base Camp.  Situated at just under 16,000ft, Hillary BC is not the true Base Camp for Makalu, but it is now just a short hike to the actual Base Camp.  The team has decided to stay at the Hillary camp for the next couple of days and wait for two remaining teammates who have been hiking in from a lower elevation.  So, the entire team should be together again today or tomorrow.  Sounds like it has been snowing a lot over the last few days, but the weather is beginning to clear and the sun is out for the first time in several days.  Tonya says this in the most beautiful mountain valley in the world...with incredible views of Makalu.

 

The view of Makalu from Hillary Base Camp.

Hiking to Base Camp

Tonya and team are all now out of Kathmandu and hiking towards Base Camp.  Several team members took a helicopter to almost 14,000ft and are just a day or two from Base Camp, while others on the team chose to hike in from much lower down and will have about 10 days of hiking before reaching camp.  Tonya and two other team members opted for the middle ground between those two options...and landed yesterday morning (Nepal time) in the village of Tashigaon - at an elevation of almost 7,000ft.  Tonya is looking at four or five days of hiking and good acclimatization before reaching Base Camp.  It's about 5:30pm on April 11th as I type this, which means the sun is just rising in Nepal and Tonya is most likely getting ready to head out for day two of the trek to BC....

 

A map of the trek into Makalu Base Camp

Off To The Mountain...Well...NOT QUITE

We are delayed in Kathmandu after a rather frustrating day yesterday.  Simply put, we could not get out. It has been a very long day. It is also a very long story. The weather was horrible in Tumlingtar, our anticipated destination and starting point of our trek to Makalu BC. Weather is projected to be bad for many days. We had to make a hard decision as a team to postpone the flight via airplane and devise a Plan B...so we have decided to share the cost of a helicopter....we go by chopper tomorrow. 

Our team was in conflict over the decision. Two members chose to go to Tumlingtar via bus. This will take two full days....then they will proceed on foot the full ten day hike. Two other members decided to take the chopper to 14,000 feet just two days from Basecamp. They will be way ahead of the porters and Sherpas etc..... Will, Arjun and I have decided to get on the same chopper but get off at a lower elevation for better acclimatization and to be closer to our bags. We will have a six day hike from there and avoid all of the low heat and leeches etc....We will avoid the lowland hiking. It was a tough decision but we feel good about our choice. 

All part of the adventure.

Plan B....Planes won't go, so it's a chopper ride to the Makalu region.

Off to the Mountain

This is the moment I have been waiting for.  We begin our travel to the mountain.  I am very excited and nervous all the same.  It takes so much to get to this point.  While it truly is the trip of a lifetime and the most beautiful mountain ever....it is down right frightening at times.  brad told me that ever since I decided to go, I stopped smiling.  Our teammate from Belgium last night confided that he too was stressed.  I loved his honesty.

In many ways it is hard to relax until this point.  Despite all the help we get from porters and our agency, there is so much to manage.  We will be in the middle of nowhere.  For the first time, I am taking a full medical kit.  I feel so good that I invested in Wilderness First Aid and Advanced Life Support classes over the last two months.  It gave me a greater confidence.

I will live out of one small barrel and one duffle bag now for the next 55 days.  I have a spare pair of crampons, a spare headlamp and one spare pair of glacier glasses.  Excess baggage fees came in at only $175 to get here....double that for the trip home.  That is the extent of the redundancy.  Now the rest depends on health, weather and teamwork.

The little things that will make my trip comfortable include: the home made beef jerky provided by Ted, the extra sims card from Jamie for emergency phone calls, the very new oxygen mask and regulator from TopOut, the warm Marmot sleeping bags and my Thor base camp tent, having Will Cross on the team (a friend of Brad's), my custom 8000m suit, my pink goggles from my dear friend Sam, my iPad that houses pictures of all my friends and family...(on Everest I did not have this), a new clear Nalgene bottle, one bag of Reece's peanut butter cups, a box of earl grey tea (yes Laura Kinman, there will be London Fogs made at BC), and most importantly the full support of Brad!

I hate to say goodbye...but it is time.  Love to all.

Departing

The day has finally come.  In the morning we leave for the airport to fly to Tumlingtar to begin our trek to the mountain.  I will no longer have easy communication but will call Brad regularly with updates which he will post on this blog.  we had a team dinner this evening.....the restaurant was so nice that I could actually have real ice cream.

Today I received my training on the TopOut oxygen system.  this is really a sweet system.  Ted Atkins has a new model in the field this year that has the control for the gas flow in the front.  in the past your regulator control is on your back on the top of the tank.  As I climber you would either need to rely on another climber to adjust your flow or take your pack off.  This is a really slick system.  Ted made me a custom knob in pink which will match my pink goggles.

Today I had the honor of meeting Chris Bonnington's Sirdar in the courtyard of Asian Trekking.  I will post the photo when I return as iris too hard to get it off my iPhone.  I knew I was in the presence of a special man when Billi Berling bowed in his presence.

Will and I spent the bulk of the day looking for a coffee press and finally found the perfect one.  We had pizza at Fire and Ice.  walked to the local grocery store and bought good toilet paper and extra lighters.  We stumbled on a lighter with a three inch flame....this is sure to work well.

We purchased our oxygen today.  It is pricey....but better than what we paid on Everest.  I basically pay $390 per bottle from TopOut and get $200 back if we return the bottle.  Yep, I have decided to use it.....I would one day like to climb without it but will test the waters on a lower 8000m peak.  Makalunis too high and has two much difficult climbing on summit day.  Having oxygen will increase my odds of success and keep me warmer.

Our gear left for BC today.  We will now hike with small day packs and one small duffle carried by a porter.  We will stay in tea houses.  Given the remote nature of this mountain, people tell me it will seems as though I have stepped back in time 30 years.  I will be carrying a very comprehensive medical kit based on the help and support of Doctor Dave, Carl Weil, Ted Handwork and Myndear hubby.  I have so much more confidence now that I took my Wliderness Advance Life Support course.

It is my plan to journal daily and share all entries upon my return.

Hugs to all!

In Kathmandu

Kathmandu is always a little hectic, a little crazy, and a little wonderful all at the same time.  The best part of hanging out in Kathmandu while waiting to leave for the mountains is catching up with old friends...

Great to see Billi again!  Billi Bierling does an amazing job of keeping track of all expedition records in Nepal with Elizabeth Hawley

 

Can't believe it has been almost five years since I last saw Birendra Singh..."Bernie" was our LO for the Annapurna IV expedition in 2008.

 

 

 

Dear Friends

Dear Friends,

I have now met my team for Makalu and wanted to tell you a little bit about them.  This is the second time that I have come to Nepal and joined a team of complete strangers.  When I did it in 2006 I said I would never do it again and yet I am doing it again.

We have Mr. Gia Tortladze from Georgia on his 30th expedition!, Mr. Will Cross from the US, a good friend of Brad's and someone I had met at OR a few years ago (so nice to have a friendly face), Mr. Arjun Vajpai from India (only 19 years old), Ms. Krushna Patil also from India, Mr.
Dominique Dejose from Belgium, and Mr. Juan Fernando from Columbia making his second attempt on Makalu.

It is a great group with a lot of experience.  We understand that Don Bowie will be flying in to climb the mountain as well.  Most of us are using oxygen but two members are attempting the climb without.  Those of us on oxygen (myself included) will all be using Ted Atkin's TopOut system.  I met with Ted yesterday for three hours and learned all about how he designed his most widely accepted regulator and mask system.  As of next year, he will be bottling his own oxygen in Nepal.

On the 10th we will fly to Tumlingtar to begin our 11 day trek to base camp.  My communications will be very limited once we begin our trek.  I do hope to get a few texts out to Brad via my inREACH Satellite system that is designed to create two way communication in text format.

I wish I had planned this trip farther in advance as I think it will likely be an amazing trek, off the beaten path, to the base amp.  It is likely that Will's father will be trekking in while we are on the mountain.  Krushna is also hopeful her boyfriend will make it in.  I will take a lot of photos to share upon my return to Kathmandu so that you may all consider this trip in the future.

Tonya

 

Ted Atkins with some of his TopOut Oxygen equipment.

Dear Jamie (On Sorting Life Out)

Dear Jamie,

I am honored and proud to have you as a friend.  You have a remarkable way of dealing with people and of treating them with respect and kindness.  The longer I know you, the more I respect all that you have accomplished.  I admire that your real love rests in exploring and in taking people to new places.  The road less traveled along with paths that produce some resistance tend to deliver the greatest rewards in life.   The world today leaves little opportunity to tap unchartered waters yet you my friend have managed to do it.

It seems to me that it is rare to meet people that "do what they do" for all of the right reasons.  If not careful our life gets created by default when we really need to take responsibility to design it.  Some how you have managed to do so and in the process you have enriched the lives of so many from the locals you hire to the clients you guide.  Those that have not discovered you yet will be amazed when then do.

You can learn more about Jamie by googling www.projecthimalaya.com and once you know him you will hang on to his friendship and never let go!

Dear Fear (On Surviving)

Dear Fear,

I am constantly asked what scares me about these big mountain trips.  The truth is that I am scared of a lot of things.  My biggest fear is not surviving whatever the mountain might throw my way.  i guess you could call this the unknown.  wrapped in that unknown is the unforeseen wind.  wind tends to break me down.  It zaps my energy and makes me very cold.  It is often hard to escape as there is no real place to seek shelter from it.

I have always been told that fear is a good thing in the mountains.   What cannot happen is panic. Panic prevents you from being able to rely on experience and get yourself out of a bad situation.  As long as you can continue to think clearly you can draw on past experiences.  I must remind myself every day that I have paid my dues.  I have climbed when I cannot feel my fingers.  Survived an all night bivy.  Crawled to the Refugio on what felt like fumes.  Trained with the best.  Climbed with the very experienced.  Learned from my many mistakes.

Yep this my way of convincing myself I am ready.  It is not easy.  I want to be surrounded by those with more experience.  I want to share the climb with close friends.  I wish we had a medical clinic at base camp.  I would like a cell tower close enough to maintain communications.  I would like to have fixed lines set to the summit.  I would even like to take a chopper to base camp.

With all that said, it will be more rewarding and enriching without any of the above.  It is only when we push ourselves beyond our comfort zone when we truly find growth and reward.  For me this is a true step from all that is secure to something that is unknown.  I am excited to choose this path and walk alone towards something new.  Sharon Connolly promised to sit on my shoulder and go along for the ride.

Tonya

Dear Makalu (Coming to See You)

Dear Makalu,

I am looking forward to meeting you.  I love that you are so far away from the fray....you stand pretty and proud all by yourself somewhere between Kanchenjunga and Everest.   You attach yourself to no one.  You play hard to get being that it takes 11 days to simply stand at your feet.

You keep to yourself.  You are rarely on Facebook.  People do not write much about you and yet you are the 5th highest mountain in the world.  Climbers gasp at your beauty.  I first saw you from the top of Everest and you were just standing all alone so peaceful.

While there is a birthday party going on Everest, you will be having a private dinner party.  I understand just 14 people other than me, have been invited.  We will be there to celebrate you.  It is not my preference to go to a party by myself when I do not know the other guests.  I was happy to hear that you have invited Will Cross....a good friend of my husbands.  It is always nice to run into a familiar face after traveling so far.

I have had mixed emotions about coming to see you.  It is not easy to travel so far by ones self.  I have spent a few nights in tears followed by numerous days in utter joy.  Tomorrow I will get on a plane from Denver to JFK to Dubai to Kathmandu.  If all goes as planned I will be knocking on your door sometime on or around April 20th.  I will be the one in the red and orange Marmot tent.

Tonya

Dear Chris (On Staying Strong)

Dear Chris,

Seven years ago I came to you two months before going to Everest begging you to be my weight trainer and kick my butt into shape for the mountain.  I figure the man who guided a blind man up the mountain, would be the one to help me the most.  I am not sure what you were thinking but you graciously accepted the daunting task.

Given that we only had two months until my departure, I got my money's worth when you told me the best thing I could do would be to eat all the Haagen Dazs, cheesecake and mac n' cheese I could muster between now and my departure.  What woman would not pay money for this type of counsel?  At the time I was 96lbs.  While I got up to 112lbs before the trip, I returned close to 97lbs (of course Brad and I spent a week eating good food in Thailand before returning to the states).  This time I will leave a full 120lbs but I have slowly been getting there over time.  What is interesting is that I wear the same size as I did on 2006 - proof that muscle weighs more than fat.  I feel so much stronger and confident with all your years of support.

What I want the world to know is that our weekly workout sessions for the past seven years have been so varied.  Not once have we ever done a repeat of a prior workout.  Somehow you have managed to keep it very interesting and fun.  People always ask what I do to train for the mountains...if they could only see the fun we have each and every week.

In addition to keeping my body strong you also work on my mind.  Our minds can talk us out of any and every thing.  You remind me not to worry about the mountain at all as my thoughts will change nothing.  You have done a marvelous job of reminding me to take it one day at a time which supports my mantra of "Eating the Elephant One Bite at a Time."

Sharon Connolly and Chris Morris at Mountains Edge

Dear Brad (On Letting Go)

Dear Brad,

Words do not exist to tell you how much your positive attitude and unrelenting support of my trip to Makalu means to me.  I only hope that through your acts of love and support, I can learn to give it back when your turn to go rolls around again.  I cannot help but want to hold you back and keep you safe.  Letting you go is always the hardest thing ever as I feel so far apart.  Yet when you let me go, I feel closer to you than ever before.  Why does it work this way?

I am excited to take all the grace and calmness that you have displayed in the mountains with me on this trip.  You have a way of remaining very relaxed and calm.  You often think I do not listen to you and yet, I have heard every word and observed every move you have ever made.  All of your acts, all of your pearls of wisdom fill my toolbox.

That my love is when I flipped the switch and realized I was ready.

I love you.

Brad and Tonya at Everest BC 2006

Dear Ted (On Time and Money)

Dear Ted,

You are the friend that told me years ago, "You will never have enough time and or money to climb Mt. Everest."  Sure seems the advice holds true again today as I struggled with making the decision to climb Makalu.  It never feels right to spend so much and be gone so long.  It is hard to rationalize but your advice rings loud in my head when faced with the decision.

I wanted to thank you for pushing me to take the Wilderness First Responder course followed by the Wilderness Advanced Life Support course during the last three months.  What I learned in those classes has given me a much greater since of confidence and courage to face the challenges imposed by the big mountains.  It meant a lot to me when you told me that I now KNOW BETTER.  In the past I have climbed a bit blind, following others, trusting others and leaning on others to get me from BC to High Camp and Beyond.  Now I have built a small arsenal of skill and I have reached a point where I do know better.

This trip is my chance to decide when to go, when to stop, when to eat, when to rest, when to push forward, and when to pull back.  I will remind myself daily that what goes with me on this mountain is the experiences shared with people like you Ted.  When the tough decision come up, I am lucky that I get to draw on thoughts of what would my dear dear friends do when faced with a similar situation.

I promise to move in marginal conditions and turn around the moment the mountain says to do so.

Tonya

Ted Returning from Everest in the 80's

Dear Tom (On Being There)

Dear Tom,

My dear friend and climbing instructor!  You were there when I showed up to the CMC to learn basic mountaineering skills, there when I could not get up Arapahoe Peak wearing my tennis shoes, there when I got my pony tail stuck in the belay device and needed assistance getting down, there when I needed a bowline on a coil to go pee pee on the Matron, there when I backed off the Bastille first pitch out of extreme fear, and most importantly....there when I called from Everest Base Camp 2006!

Over the last few days as I prepare for Makalu, I am reminded of all the support you provided in getting me ready to go to Everest years ago.  I have spent the last two days playing with the HotTronic boot heaters you researched and prepared for me when I was most worried about losing a toe from frostbite.  We learned about these little devices when Ellen Milller spoke at Outdoor Divas after her summit of Mount Everest.  These little battery operated heated foot pads, borrowed from the ski industry, are a reasonable insurance policy.  With an average weighted cost of approximately $100/per toe, they are worth their weight in gold.

In yesterday's test, I found they would stay warm for close to 8 hours on a low setting of 2.  We both know this is reduced to closer to 5-6 hours in the extreme cold temps of the high Himals.  I reflect on all the effort you endured in getting the company to send us some extension cords so that the batteries could be carried in my chest pockets vs. being attached to the back of my boot where they risk being knocked off and being exposed to the extreme cold temps.

The only challenge with this system is getting a good charge at BaseCamp and being scorned for being a Shi Shi climber in the 21st century.  How did Mallory and Irvine manage with leather boots?

Tom for all your care and concern, I appreciate you so much.  Thank you for being there.

Dear Dad (Why I Do It)

Dear Al,

It seems I am heading off to do another big peak in less than two weeks.  Every time I get close to going I get cold feet and I start asking myself why?  I go through the usual means of rationalization which include; mountains are beautiful and they lure me like a magnet, I want to see what my body is capable of doing, we were born to climb (out of our cribs, up trees), we all strive to go to high points (look at people that climb up in the Statute of Liberty, business people who want the top floor office), and the list goes on.  None of them seem to really answer my question.

I then back into....I have spent the last 16 years training for mountains and the real mountains are in Nepal and India.  Next comes, well I have a lot of expensive gear that I have collected over the years and I need to put it all to good use.  Followed by, I am not getting any younger and I can only do these big peaks for so long....and then it hits me!  I go back to that childhood day when you made me sit still for one minute.  You told me not to say a word while you timed it.  It seemed to last forever.  When it was over, you quietly and calmly told me that minute is gone for good.  I will never get it back.  You reminded me there was no money in the world that could retrieve it.

That was it!  That was the day that sent me spinning and living as though every day was my last.  I have never been able to shake it.  It seems to hold true as I am about to turn 50.  It still seems as though I am 21.  Where did all those years...all those minutes go? They are gone in a flash.  As I found myself between jobs, I decided this is the moment...this is the day....

You may have robbed me of one painful minute many years ago...but that little exercise have filled my life with many glorious moments that add up to life of which I am very proud.  You sent me running to and up Mount Everest in 2006 (as at the time, I felt it was now or never)  where I met my husband Brad.  As they say, there is a reason time is referred to as the present....it is because it is a gift.

Thank you!  I love you.

Photo:  Courtesy of Jamie McGuinness